Embracing the New

Part I: Evaluation (scroll down to previous post)

Part II: Realignment

I call this period in my life - unemployment. Some kind souls have courteously termed it “transition between jobs”. As mentioned in the previous post, it has been characterised by conflict, anxiety and a conviction to live by the truth. Despite the tension, it has been a fruitful season.

I was highly encouraged by my cell leader to join the Bible Study Fellowship (BSF) since I had the time to build spiritual foundations in the Word. Though every session has yet to be fully digested, I have been blessed by BSF and now aim to walk in closer fellowship with God. The availability of time and much reduced levels of stress allowed my fiancé and I to build our relationship together, which has been very much needed leading up to our wedding. Our pre-wedding jitters had brought us to a low point but things are looking up now as we learn to set aside time to communicate with each other, which has significantly reduced the amount of time we spend quarrelling. Serving in youth ministry has also built our relationship on stronger ground as we serve God together. Increased time spent with the youths gave me the privilege of speaking into their lives, which brings me great joy. I also get more time to spend with my family members and on myself.

In addition, I’ve had opportunities to explore various career options across different sectors. Through the method of elimination, taking into consideration feasibility and current interest, I have chosen to pursue floristry. The process of elimination was a taxing one, punctuated by impulsive spurs to get people’s opinions on the road less travelled, frenzied search to know God’s will regarding employment and ignoring comments that allude to the fact that I was going to be a “Tai Tai” (obviously out of the question). The fact that the jobs I had narrowed down weren’t sinful was enough reason for me not to struggle with society’s view on what a “proper job” entails. Since there was no time pressure to pick out a career path, I just went with the one which I was more interested in. Period. Rather than bemoan the fact that I had to choose a “proper job” just because I “had to” while having to struggle with a lack of passion for the job, I chose something which I was interested in and allows the space for personal growth.

I reckon that choosing to pursue floristry allows me to glorify and honour God with my talents. It also gives me more time to continue to build relationships with people and spend time delving into His word to know Him more. The uncertainty of this journey challenges me to increase my faith in God and to put my trust in Him for I know that His plans are for my good. I want to grow in depending on God more and less upon myself. It would definitely be a faith-building journey that I choose to embark on. Thus, even if the whole flower thing doesn’t work out, the process will have allowed me to grow in my faith, which is something that is of eternal worth and will never be taken away from me. At the end of the day, I could possibly be taking up a “proper job” but that would be another story for another day.

Rev Edmund Chan defined “Efficacy” to be doing the right thing, at the right time, in the right way, with the right motives, to produce the right result. God is an efficacious God. I believe that this season of unemployment is efficacious as it brought me a step closer to knowing Him. The fact that I can choose to want to live life in such a way that I can know more about my God, so that I can love Him and the people around me more, shows that this season has indeed been a fruitful one. And it doesn’t end here. I’m praying that in the next step of the journey, I’d be more acquainted with Kingdom values and continually learn to shed my old self. This journey has not been taken in a solo fashion. It has been the distilled essence of many family members, friends and mentors’ support, which reinforces to the importance of community in my life.

God created every individual uniquely and each of us have a distinct tapestry of God’s handiwork in our lives. Our stories may not pan out in the same way, but they all point to the same God, who’s sovereign today and forever more.